Back To The Drawing Board of Trust
There are many times life does not always work out the way we plan. When I was younger, I thought I could map out my life and somehow it would fit perfectly together and all the puzzle pieces would make sense. Life experience has taught me I cannot plan for everything in life. Actually, there are few things I can plan for. The roads and curves of life seem to swerve in so many different directions. At times, it feels like I am on a motorcycle ride with my God and family. As we go around the bends and mountains of life, we often cannot see what is next. Even as Christian women of faith and leaders in the church, we too can feel lost. It can be scary not knowing what is next.
Today I sit at my computer, at a major transition in life. I’m about a week away from having a baby. It’s exciting, scary, and there are a ton of unknowns about the future. In a lot of ways, it feels like I am back at the drawing board again. Here sits this beautiful blank page…who will I be? How will we raise our child? What will we encounter? Have you ever been in a place of transition like this?
The biggest word which comes to mind is: TRUST.
Trust is this crazy word which has all sorts of definitions and meanings. What is trust?
Over the years, I have learned a lot about trust. I have learned that trust is not an either or. Trust is a relational process. It takes time. It takes patience. It takes stepping out in faith. It takes risking getting hurt. It takes risking in vulnerability and authenticity.
I’ve encountered a lot of experiences in my life, and many times when I have had to reach out in faith and trust God. There have been so many times when I have had to walk without the ability to see. In each of these times, I know God has been with me. Even in the silent moments of life, even in the quiet seasons, even in the places of the wilderness…somehow God has been there in all of those moments.
I guess as I go back to the drawing board today, I meditate on trust. Trusting God, trusting self, trusting others, and hoping somehow that the picture will fill out again. Believing that what was once a picture full of color to see is now again a blank canvass…waiting to dream again, waiting to step out in faith, waiting to be full again. Waiting and trusting…
What are your thoughts on trust?
Proverbs 3:5-6 English Standard Version (ESV)
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
6 In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.